Wisdom
“Do you suppose that you alone have had this experience? Are you surprised, as if it were a novelty, that after such long travel and so many changes of scene you have not been able to shake off the gloom and heaviness of your mind? You need a change of soul rather than a change of climate.” — Seneca
The fucking stoics, man. This quote got served up to me about a day before I was about to depart on a 6 week-long trip to Europe. To make matters worse it was in the form of a TikTok. I know that it’s pretty correct, but having it pop up in such a palatable format like this really rubbed salt into the wound. I can’t go overseas to escape a little bit?! I’ve finally had time to work through all my past mistakes without the burden of full-time work and I’m supposed to have sorted all this out BEFORE I left? When? In my downtime? When I’m on the couch blitzing through episodes of a show that’s barely okay?
Part of me is ready to fall into the rabbit hole of stoic philosophy and live my life by it. The other side knows that a bunch of Greek nerds from the 3rd century don’t know shit about fuck. Can the stoics tell me how to maintain ~1300 parasocial relationships on Instagram? Seneca died in 65AD, obviously travelling didn’t pull you out of a tailspin. Did Seneca ever have the opportunity to be blown away by the massive wall of duty-free cigs at Qatar airport? I don’t think so. That genuinely amazed me. Enough to make me forget about ALL the mistakes I’ve ever made in my entire life? No, but it was very impressive.
Travel is such an easy thing to make your entire personally; on the move, always leaving, always arriving. It is nice for a little bit. For me, travel is the only good excuse to leave work for an extended period if you can’t go on maternity leave. That or having a full mental breakdown.
My trip ended up being one for the books, if one of the books was called “Great Trips Ben has been on”. Edinburgh Fringe was one of the best experiences of my life. Performing 48 shows in just over 2 weeks was a challenge, it was like being able to do an intense comedy course. I felt renewed as a comic, which hopefully doesn’t sound too wanky.
The three weeks of travelling after was mostly amazing, with a few little lulls, but I think that’s standard for a trip of that length. It was a huge adjustment to three weeks of solo travel after being around people constantly at the Edinburgh fringe. Shockingly, It was slightly harder to make friends travelling solo at 35 than it was at 21. I eventually found my rhythm and made the most of the time away.
I think reflecting on the trip, I probably did need to figure some stuff out before I left instead of putting off all self-analysis until the solo travelling, it does put too many expectations on the trip. It takes effort to take yourself out of the daily minutiae to look at yourself while at home, on holiday alone you have no choice. Maybe those god-forsaken stoics were onto something.
Shutterbug
I’ve been enjoying taking photos again, but not sure where to post them. I’ve been posting them a bit on Instagram, but it doesn’t feel like the right spot for some reason. Might be time to get a tumblr again.
Content Corner
Playlist - Last While
Here is a collection of songs that I have been listening to on and off for the last 3-4 months. My Spotify wrapped this year said my most listened-to genre was “Dreamo”. I can only assume that’s dreamy emo. There is some of that on here, but a true mixed bag of stuff I listen to, I hope you find some stuff you like.
That’s it for this edition :)
How funny it is to travel and feel like our world and experience is so small and almost doesn’t matter at all, but also it does, because your getting to do this. That’s why travel is cool! 🤙🏻
Loving the photos Searlo!